The original request you provided is understandable, but it could be rephrased for clarity and a more formal tone. Here is a revised version:
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"Dear [Recipient's Name],
I hope this message finds you well. I am reaching out to request some financial assistance from you. I have been waiting for two months for a payment that is owed to me, but I have only received excuses for the delay. Currently, I need funds to pay my industrial training